another fire. can’t sleep. anxiety. my muscles are all sore. my mind never rests now. business is down 50% since the fire. if you walk behind the restaurant where LSE was it’s depressing.
i got up to write and ended up texting with this old friend who now lives in china. we went back and forth an hour and now i don’t need to write. i don’t know what i need. i feel like i need some drug that could deliver me from all of the anxiety and stress and tension i feel right now. have been feeling for 10 days.
my life was going along so good. now i feel like i just want to go away somewhere. escape. that’s what i long for right now.
i used to love going to work. now i hate it. i get no comfort in sleep. i toss and turn. i don’t sleep. i lay there. i sleep a little. i’m hungry. i’m always hungry. food does not satisfy me. beer and wine don’t taste good. the couch isn’t comfortable.
maybe i should go right now to ihop and order as much food as possible. i’m so hungry.